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It is mid-November, which means Britain has once again agreed to feel things in unison during the ad break. Here is a scoring system for the tropes, the cover songs and the lonely grandfathers — so you can enjoy the argument without accidentally buying a scented candle.
The clocks have changed, the firework smoke has cleared, and Britain has entered its greyest stretch. Here are ten seasonal rituals we are politely declining until the sun returns — plus far more honest ways to endure the dark.
Britain’s Christmas markets are back: same wooden huts, same £9 mulled wine, same faint smell of wet bratwurst. Here’s a half-empty guide to enduring them — or, better, avoiding them entirely.